Tree Blood

Doesn't some of this sap look like super-old-dude balls?At work in the wood-shop today I got a huge gob of tree sap on my shirt, left breast, over my heart.  So, that's it for that shirt I thought, no big deal I'll just let it dry.  So, it dried all right, right through the shirt and into my chest hair where it bonded with my nipple.  I have not yet thought about how this is going to end, but I suspect it will involve a large amount of baby oil and a razor.  Optimally, someone will walk into this impending bathroom scene at the choicest possible moment.